Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
