First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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