Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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