he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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