like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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