Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Randomize
