i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
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seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
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my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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