I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
