Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Randomize
