I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Randomize
