If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
