I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
No stitches, just platelets and will power
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
