hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
