My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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