let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Randomize
