I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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