I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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