ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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