Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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