There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
We don't watch enough power rangers
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
