Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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