Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
