Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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