Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
