Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize