I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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