It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
