I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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