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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)

  (540): View more from Virginia

  awesome babe! drinks tonight!

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...

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• (805): View more from California

  Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.

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  17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.

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• (276): View more from Virginia

  I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.

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• (813): View more from Florida

  I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.

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  These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly

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