North Korea, Best Korea!
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
