i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize