I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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