Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
