theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.