drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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