Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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