I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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