ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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