Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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