I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize
