New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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