we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
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I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
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You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
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