is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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