I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
