He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize