It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
