So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.