Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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