oh god the rape fog is back!
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
