Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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