Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
